{"id":763,"date":"2013-09-21T21:41:04","date_gmt":"2013-09-22T02:41:04","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.theonlyloveproject.org\/?p=763"},"modified":"2013-12-12T19:14:49","modified_gmt":"2013-12-13T00:14:49","slug":"love-is-a-virus-one-i-think-we-should-spread-tom-proctor","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.theonlyloveproject.org\/?p=763","title":{"rendered":"\u201cLove is a virus. One I think we should spread.” – Tom Proctor"},"content":{"rendered":"

On August 29, 2013, The Only Love Project’s Bill Murphy (BM) spent an enjoyable hour via Skype with Hollywood actor, stunt performer, director, and producer Tom Proctor<\/a> (TM). What follows is the transcript of our conversation. Enjoy!<\/p>\n

BM: Briefly tell us your background. What would you like others to know about you?<\/p>\n

\"Screen<\/a>TP: Well, my background is I grew up a farm boy, raised on the family farm. And it was one of those, like, five farms together to make one little farm, so to speak. And so it was kind of funny, you know. I didn\u2019t know until after I had moved away from home and until I was about 34 years old that we were poor when we were kids. I always thought we were doing great, because all our family, we\u2019d run cattle up on the range, and we each owned like five acres that we\u2019d come down to the river a lot, you know, there\u2019s big-ass trout in the river right next to your house, so what was missing? [laughs] I didn\u2019t know until I got older that we were basically poverty level. I said, \u201cReally? Wow, I didn\u2019t know that.\u201d<\/p>\n

BM: What effect did your childhood have on you?<\/p>\n

TP: It really made the core of who I am. And at the end of the day, at the end of anybody\u2019s day, I think the core of who you are is really all you\u2019ve got. You got the world that has its expectations \u2013 especially when you\u2019re in the film industry \u2013 of what you are and who you should be. And then you\u2019ve got what makes you what you are. I\u2019ve been a very competitive person; I\u2019ve competed in motorcycle skill trials, drag bike races, I\u2019ve been a competitive fighter, everything else. And I always felt like I won, because of where I came from. Because that was my family, and that was the way it was. And my mom was one that always managed to promote the positive. And my dad\u2019s my biggest hero. Everybody thinks in Hollywood we\u2019re all supposed to have some sad, abusive childhood. And I just really don\u2019t. [laughs]<\/p>\n

BM: [laughs] What\u2019s a nice guy like you doing in a place like Hollywood?<\/p>\n

\"Screen<\/a>TP: It\u2019s like this. People would always stop and ask my grandpa as he\u2019s digging ditches or whatever, they\u2019d say, \u201cSo, what\u2019s the neighborhood like around here? What are people like around here? And he\u2019d say the same thing every time. He\u2019d say, \u201cWhat are they like where you come from?\u201d And they\u2019d say they\u2019re either good, bad, or indifferent. Whatever. Then he\u2019d say, \u201cYeah, that\u2019s pretty much what I think you\u2019ll find here.\u201d And that is what I think happens. I\u2019ve been very blessed to find awesome people. I had stuntmen bringing me up in the business and trying to keep me alive instead of make an impressive record for them. I\u2019ve been really, really fortunate. And then I\u2019ve run into those producers that the words \u201cscorched earth\u201d comes to mind. And with them, I just find that the way I handle things don\u2019t change. I had my first agent and manager drop me one time because I held a producer upside-down out of the third story of a hotel, because he was gonna basically rip off a whole crew that I had lined up for him. And she said, \u201cThat ain\u2019t the way business is done here.\u201d And I said, \u201cYeah, people go to court and they never see their money. That\u2019s how business is done there. That ain\u2019t how business is done where I come from.\u201d And I learned that from a man that was one of my mentors, that always told me, he said, \u201cThere\u2019s no such thing as losing, there\u2019s only an alternate route to winning.\u201d And this is a man that would fly me all over the place to buy horses and stuff like that for him. I mean, we\u2019re talking high-dollar horses. And he said, \u201cAs long as you do business where everybody wins on both sides, all the time, it\u2019s a win-win. Look for a win-win, everybody wins, you will never lose.\u201d I went down to Colorado, bought a cuttin’ horse the day before a futurity for $50,000. The horse won that futurity, which meant it was now worth a quarter of a million dollars. It also, because the horse came in from Australia, got a virus that we weren\u2019t used to in America, and killed the entire barn. I called the same man up, I said, \u201cPlease tell me where the win is here. You said there\u2019s no such thing as losing, only an alternate route to winning. Well, the horse is dead.\u201d I had a pilot\u2019s license. The man said, \u201cI want you to fly down to Dallas. You\u2019re going to go to the Fireman\u2019s Fund, take that paperwork on that horse, take that loan out, I\u2019ll raise the loan, take out a $750,000 loan against that horse.\u201d And I said, \u201cWait, wait, wait, wait, I thought everybody wins, nobody loses money. You\u2019re taking a loan out on a dead horse.\u201d And he said, \u201cThat\u2019s right, get a balloon payment, I\u2019ll get it all set up. Don\u2019t worry.\u201d I said, \u201cBut somebody\u2019s gonna lose money if they loan money on a dead horse.\u201d He said, \u201cI\u2019ll explain later.\u201d So trusting the man, I flew down there and did that, got the loan and everything. We flew in. Then we began to wheel and deal. The short version of this story is I personally handled the finances on what amounted to just under two million dollars. So you\u2019re talking to a man who sold a dead horse for two million dollars, and nobody lost money on it. [laughs]<\/p>\n

BM: [laughs]<\/p>\n

\"Screen<\/a>TP: Everybody made money, and everybody\u2019s happy. That\u2019s how you have to get to Hollywood. You have people say in Hollywood, \u201cPeople lose money on movies.\u201d No they don\u2019t. At least I don\u2019t. I\u2019m at a point now where I can produce my own movies. If I can sell a dead horse for two million dollars, I\u2019m not going to let my investors lose money on a movie. That just ain\u2019t gonna happen. [laughs]<\/p>\n

BM: Is there much call for dead horses these days?<\/p>\n

TP: [laughs] It\u2019s like I\u2019ve said several times: the difference between Hollywood and New York is that both of \u2018em will steal your wallet. In Hollywood, they\u2019ll help you look for it. [laughs]<\/p>\n

BM: Would you consider yourself a spiritual person?<\/p>\n

\"Screen<\/a>TP: That\u2019s a really tough question. Because, by my own rules, I think, yeah. Because, I mean, you\u2019re looking at a man that really has been dead twice, so I can\u2019t help but think that. And I\u2019ve had just too many really, really good things happen for there to not be a God involved. What\u2019s his name? Is it Jesus, Buddha, Mohammed? I don\u2019t know what his name is. As a kid I used to look at different religions and all this God stuff, and I didn\u2019t know really what to think about it. So I asked this one cowboy one time, we were out at Lewis\u2019 Ranch, herding cattle, and I says, \u201cWhat do you think about God and all this stuff?\u201d And he said, \u201cBoy, I look at it this way,\u201d he said, \u201cI don\u2019t think God\u2019s any different than Jim.\u201d And I said, \u201cJim?\u201d And he said, \u201cYeah, Jim Lewis, the guy I work for.\u201d I go, \u201cJim ain\u2019t God.\u201d He says, \u201cNo, Jim ain\u2019t God, but you work for him just like you should be working for God.\u201d And I said, \u201cOk.\u201d He said, \u201cI don\u2019t build buildings in Jim\u2019s name, and I don\u2019t even sing songs about Jim. But I do take care of his cattle; it doesn\u2019t matter if they\u2019re black, white, or black and white, or brown. If they\u2019re tangled in the fence, I untangle them. If they\u2019re hungry, I\u2019ll feed \u2018em. And that\u2019s where I kind of look at it with God, too. You just kind of take care of everybody around you, if they\u2019re hungry, feed them. If you can help them out, help them out.\u201d And I said, \u201cWhat if that ain\u2019t good enough?\u201d And he goes, \u201cWell, if that ain\u2019t good enough, I don\u2019t think I should be taking care of them anyhow.\u201d [laughs]<\/p>\n

BM: [laughs]<\/p>\n

\"Screen<\/a>TP: You know, at times I go into different churches and listen. I have never heard any church preach something that hurt someone. I\u2019ve never heard any religion teach something that wasn\u2019t an attempt at making a better person. And many attempts at making a better person, is an attempt on the part of that person. It\u2019s just like me. If you attempt to make me the sexy leading man, it ain\u2019t gonna happen. But, you keep me in the serial killer role, I will do it for you.<\/p>\n

BM: Most religious traditions speak of the power and value of love. For example: The Dhammapada tells us, \u201cOnly love dispels hate.\u201d\u00a0The Bible tells us, \u201cA new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.\u201d What, if anything, do those words means to you?<\/p>\n

TP: Those words are, to me, like coin to a man of the realm, because I don\u2019t think anyone survives without love. It is a motivator for all things. And it dispels all prejudice. It goes back to this: you\u2019re gonna find what you\u2019re looking for. If I\u2019m looking for love, in every person, then that\u2019s what I\u2019ll find in you. You go around looking for an enemy, especially here in Hollywood, you start looking for people to screw you, and you\u2019ll find that, too.<\/p>\n

BM: [laughs]<\/p>\n

TP: If you start looking for friends, and looking for people you can love and do love, you\u2019ll find that, too.<\/p>\n

BM: Sure.<\/p>\n

TP: I\u2019ll never, never, never forget, we had the horses ready to go up Dry Canyon and come back down Clear Creek. My grandpa would be there, my grandmother came home, she worked as a nurse at this time, she’d come home, I mean, he was close to his 70s at this point, and I\u2019m watching my grandpa check out my grandma\u2019s ass.<\/p>\n

BM: [laughs]<\/p>\n

TP: As he tells us, \u201cOh, my neck\u2019s a little stiff. You boys take the horses up without me,” because she\u2019s off work. [laughs]<\/p>\n

BM: [laughs] That\u2019s amazing.<\/p>\n

\"Screen<\/a>TP: You know? Well, he was an old prize fighter and a cowboy that was jumping out of the back of trucks onto mustangs when he was 67 years old, I remember that. He was pretty busted up in his old age, you know. My grandpa was at the Stockyard one day, and some of those old horse traders were out there, and my grandpa pulled up in the car, gets out of his car, goes to the backseat, gets out his walker, walks around to the other side and opens the door for her; she gets out. The other fella looks over at him and goes, \u201cMan, why the hell you openin\u2019 the door for her? She can get out faster than you can.\u201d And he looked up at him and said, \u201cCause she don\u2019t mind waitin\u2019.” My grandpa is my biggest hero. He was a prize fighter that was totally goddamn awesome, plus the fact that he could throw a mustang off its feet, at 65 could throw a stang on its head until he got a side on it and break it out. That, right there made him my hero.<\/p>\n

BM: What role can love play in the world today?<\/p>\n

\"Screen<\/a>TP: I think love, if we all just embrace it, will affect everybody. We\u2019re trying to fix the politicians, and you can\u2019t fix them. We\u2019re out there trying to fix the country that you can\u2019t fix. We\u2019re arguing about the right to bear arms vs. the wrong people getting their hands on the guns. I grew up in a world where everybody carried a gun, and nobody got shot except the muskrats and that was because they were digging ditches. And if you could manage to get the whole world to focus on love\u2026I like to say that love is a virus. Virus don\u2019t have to be a bad word. It can spread. I\u2019ve got a little Polish girl in my acting class. I challenge you to be around her without smiling. You\u2019re gonna smile. Because she has contagious happiness. I challenge you to be around people that just love openly, honestly, and freely, and be angry. Try it. It ain\u2019t gonna happen. I was a cage fighter. I went into one of my cage fights, and the guy across from me was looking at me with hate in his eyes and snorting like a bull, like \u201cI just wanna rip your head off.\u201d And it was December, they were all coming into this music of Pantera and music like that. And I come skipping into the ring to the tune of \u201cIt\u2019s beginning to look a lot like Christmas.\u201d Because I don\u2019t hate the man. And I looked over at him and he\u2019s just looking at me with all kinds of hatred. And I said, \u201cI really don\u2019t know who screwed your life, but it wasn\u2019t me. And you need to get over it. This is just a paycheck. Why do you hate me? If I\u2019m not here, you don\u2019t get a paycheck. You\u2019re not here, I don\u2019t get a paycheck. I\u2019ll still work, but I don\u2019t get a paycheck.\u201d<\/p>\n

BM: That\u2019s wonderful.<\/p>\n

TP: Absolutely. It\u2019s like I told you in an e-mail, one of my best friends, I wasn\u2019t in shape for fights, I wasn\u2019t ready. Anyways, one of my friends he\u2019s just stomping around going, \u201cOh my god, my fighter didn\u2019t show up, I can\u2019t pay my rent, I\u2019m not going to be able to make my rent.\u201d I said, \u201cHey, don\u2019t worry about it. Tell him I\u2019ll fight you. I\u2019ll square it with the boxing commission. Tell him I\u2019ll fight you.\u201d \u201cYou\u2019d do that?\u201d I says, \u201cYeah.\u201d<\/p>\n

BM: Actually, that was really nice of you.<\/p>\n

\"Screen<\/a>TP: Yeah, a lot of people said, \u201cI thought you liked him.\u201d \u201cI do.\u201d \u201cSo you gonna let him win?\u201d \u201cNo, I\u2019m gonna kick his ass. But, he\u2019ll still get a paycheck, because that\u2019s the job.\u201d I get on a horse, I pull the horse in a circle until we get to where we understand each other, but I don\u2019t hate the horse. I trained mountain lions and bears for a movie investor, and when they charge at me, I don\u2019t hate them, I know that\u2019s an instinct. So we communicate something different.<\/p>\n

BM: True.<\/p>\n

TP: Love is a virus. One I think we should spread.<\/p>\n

BM: I like that. In fact, I think I\u2019ll use that as the headline of our interview. See, I just wrote it down.<\/p>\n

\"Screen<\/a>TP: It\u2019s easy to preach one thing, and what we preach is really what we\u2019re learning, but what\u2019s really terrible is I would go in. I surround myself with very nice people, because I\u2019m really not a nice person. My dad is a nice person. I thought he was a wimp for most of my life, because he never even raised his voice. But as long as I\u2019m around these nice people, I stay nice. But especially when one asshole comes into that group, if they attempt to change that dynamic, instead of saying what I\u2019m saying now, or doing what I\u2019m saying now, I guess I should say, that love is a virus, and staying about love and spreading it, I grab the easy out. I turn into an asshole, because it is a virus too. It\u2019s the two choices of how you can react. You can come out and be a dick to me, and I can be a dick back. And then we\u2019re gonna find out who\u2019s the strongest, because it\u2019s gonna lead to blows, which is not gonna solve the problem. The only thing that fighting ever solves is if you question if you are a better fighter than me. We can fight and answer that question. But if you are opposed to gay marriage, and I\u2019m in favor of it, we can\u2019t hate each other and solve that problem. We can\u2019t fight and solve that problem. We can only exchange information until it circles around, and everything circles around, and the truth always lands in the same place. So you\u2019ve gotta be open to the circle.<\/p>\n

BM: What stops people from being more loving and compassionate?<\/p>\n

\"Screen<\/a>TP: The same thing that stops them from being rich. The same thing that stops them from being successful. The same thing that stops them from being happy. And it\u2019s that four letter f-word, fear. It\u2019s always fear. We had a project where we — it takes one step at a time to get homeless people into jobs and off of the street. We\u2019ve got this guy set up with an apartment, and guess what. He would go to the apartment, shower. He would go to the apartment, eat, and then he would go back to a spot on the street and sleep. Out of fear that the apartment could be taken from him the minute he didn\u2019t have a job anymore. But he had to keep that spot on the street. That\u2019s what makes it so difficult to spread love as a virus. For me to come up to you and say, \u201cHey, you know what? My name\u2019s Tom Proctor. I really like you. You seem like a likeable guy. I\u2019d like to sit down and have coffee with you, and get to know you.\u201d My fear is, this guy\u2019s gonna think I\u2019m gay, coming on to him. He\u2019s going to reject me. Right now, I\u2019m all exposed, I might as well be naked, am I gonna get slapped down for it? What will they think? And we teach our kids to think like this growing up. That\u2019s not how you behave in public. Really? I think that child\u2019s instinct on how to behave in public is probably better than all the shit we\u2019re trying to teach him. I will give you another example of how the world becomes messed up. I grew up in a small town; we didn\u2019t even have a police department. 20 miles of washboard road to the nearest grocery store if you want to call it that. It was a grocery store, gas station job. You know what I\u2019m talking about? And then our bank was Western Mountain Bank, I think it was called or something. Everybody had a gun. And then as the city started to move in, I remember taking my kids through the McDonalds drive-through on the horse and buggy, still having the gun on my side. I would walk in and out of my bank with my pistol on my side. And everybody knew me, \u201cHi, Tom. How you doing?\u201d Blah, blah, blah. Then I went away, I was gone in the service, and the film industry, blah blah blah. And I come back, and the bank was a brick building. I go into my bank, I walk up to the teller, and the girl goes white as a sheet, and screams, \u201cHe\u2019s got a gun!\u201d And quickly, like someone out of a John Wayne movie, I spin and draw my gun, looking for who it was that had the gun, not thinking she was talking about me, because I\u2019m not the bad guy. This is what happens. We project our own fears onto the other guy. The guy that\u2019s behind you blasting his horn in traffic, and you immediately go, \u201cWhat an asshole.\u201d You go, \u201cOh my gosh, maybe he\u2019s trying to get his wife to the hospital. There\u2019s no way that I can get out of his way. Is there something that I can do to assist?\u201d Instead you go, \u201cFuck you, dude, I can\u2019t move.\u201d<\/p>\n

BM: You pulled a gun in the bank? You\u2019re kidding me.<\/p>\n

TP: No, that\u2019s what I did. Scared the shit out of everybody.<\/p>\n

BM: My friend, you\u2019re going to have to finish your story now. What happened next?<\/p>\n

\"Screen<\/a>TP: A bunch of cops show up, and they were young cops, and they were acting like assholes. So I turned in the gun, told a couple of officers, \u201cYour momma know you play with guns?\u201d Because they were little kids, I\u2019m looking at kids. Shortly after this, this was at a time when there was no law against wearing a gun. And then shortly afterwards they got a bill passed through that made it illegal to carry a weapon in public. And it was bizarre because they passed that bill based on a bus that got hit at a railroad crossing from being too close, and so they put the bill under a safety on a bus bill, where all the stuff about the bus was there, and then down at the bottom was also carrying a gun, and they shoved that bill through. And there\u2019s a lot of things that go on like that, just like right now, they found they can\u2019t get rid of our right to bear arms, so what the government\u2019s done is buy up all the ammo. So you literally, you almost can\u2019t buy it. And then what\u2019ll happen is, once the manufacturers increase their manufacturing size to meet demand, then [the government will] release that stock and put all those manufacturers out of business. So unemployment is the workaround for not listening to the public on what they really want. And all of that, if you think about it, if you listen with love, to both sides again, that circle will start, and truth will come full circle. But if you listen with ‘this is my agenda,’ it ain\u2019t gonna happen. Barack Obama could have the greatest plans in the world, and he would never get them implemented, because there\u2019s too many people that just want to stop him, because they didn\u2019t agree with him. Rather than say, \u201cOk, he\u2019s got that job now. Let\u2019s work with him. Let\u2019s listen.\u201d<\/p>\n

BM: Do you have recommendations regarding how someone might cultivate a spirit of love over the long term…but also put\u00a0love into action\u00a0right now <\/i>so that he or she can make a positive difference right away?<\/p>\n

\"Screen<\/a>TP: I have one that I\u2019m trying to implement. It actually comes from a thing called The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People<\/em>. One of the first goals is seek first to understand, and then to be understood. I think with that, you\u2019ve gotta dispel all personal agendas, like if we\u2019re having this conversation, you and I are having a conversation about anything, but I have an agenda, then I\u2019m not really listening to you. I need to listen to you, drop my agenda long enough to listen to you, hear what it is you want, and then really take a beat and go, \u201chmm, does that actually work for me?\u201d But instead, we have to quickly respond with an answer, because we want to look intelligent. I think we\u2019re afraid to say, \u201cYou know what? I\u2019m not sure how I feel about that. Can we take this conversation elsewhere, give me time to think about it?\u201d Used car salesmen thrive on that, not giving you time to think about it. I don\u2019t want to do my workout when I get up in the morning. But I know I\u2019ve got to get up and do that workout first or it ain\u2019t gonna happen. My day\u2019s gonna catch up with me, it\u2019s gonna run away. So if you just start out with saying, \u201cI\u2019m going to spread love virally, somehow\u201d then you\u2019ll find opportunities to do that. And I think that in your conversations just listening and really trying to understand is step one.<\/p>\n

BM: “Seek first to understand, then to be understood” is the foundation for everything else that follows. But it\u2019s hard to do consistently.<\/p>\n

\"Screen<\/a>TP: Yes, it is. Yes, it is. It\u2019s very hard. I would like someone to tell me anything in this world that\u2019s worth doing that didn\u2019t take some work into it, some dig into it. We had the best tomatoes and the best broccoli and everything on our farm. Because before, I would take all the manure from the chickens and plow it into the ground. That required extra work and an extra bit of plowing, but it\u2019s nitrate. So our tomatoes were this big around and didn\u2019t require salt. There\u2019s a point where instead of working for the politicians and everybody else, there\u2019s a point where we have to say, I am responsible. I can make a difference myself. I guess to do that, we have to drop our agendas. And now here\u2019s the trick question. Am I able to do that? A lot of times I forget. And I come out of it and go, \u201cAh, fucked that opportunity up.\u201d The only thing you can do is go, \u201cOk, I fucked that opportunity up. I\u2019m going to have to grab it on the next one.\u201d It\u2019s just like I\u2019ve been working out, getting back in shape for some film projects, I\u2019ve dropped 18 pounds, I\u2019ve put on a lot of muscle mass, everything like that, but tacos got the best of me the other night. So what happens, you go, \u201cOk, I screwed that up. I\u2019ll have to do another half hour on my cardio tomorrow.\u201d I get that. That\u2019s life.<\/p>\n

BM: You can\u2019t drag the past into the present. You have to let it go.<\/p>\n

\"Screen<\/a>TP: Yes. And I\u2019ll tell you where I get my best examples from. In The Lion King, the little monkey walks up to Simba and bops him in the head with the stick. And he goes, \u201cOw, what\u2019d you do that for?\u201d He says, \u201cForget about it, it\u2019s in the past.\u201d And then he hits him again and says, \u201cForget about it, it\u2019s in the past.\u201d It\u2019s gotta be that quick. Because we\u2019re humans, and we fuck up that quick.<\/p>\n

BM: And that\u2019s okay. Mistakes happen. But it\u2019s not skillful to live with regret.<\/p>\n

TP: The purpose of regret is so that you would not do the same mistake based on guilt. Who wants to live with guilt? How about we don\u2019t do the same mistake based on happiness, based on love, based on future?<\/p>\n

BM: Who do you look up to the most when you think of the power of love?<\/p>\n

\"Screen<\/a>TP: Wow, that\u2019s a tough one. That would be between my mom and my dad. Yeah. I\u2019ve had great examples from both. I\u2019ll go back to one, I think right now it\u2019s actually, who I look up to most when it comes to love, I would have to say the woman I\u2019ve been married to for over 20 years. She\u2019s totally selfless with our kids and our grandkids, I think she\u2019s taken a lot from my mom, but a lot of it\u2019s from overall knowledge and creativity and she\u2019s promoted our girls and made ’em better people. I was gone a lot from my kids\u2019 life, because that\u2019s what I did. But my kids all turned out awesome. And the other thing that she did was she came as a package with three kids. And when that package came, those kids were mine. There was no distinction. I\u2019m the same with “mine are hers.” Matter of fact, I think any one of the kids would kill you if you tried to bad-talk their stepbrothers or stepsisters. They actually look alike. Her kids look more like my biological kids than hers. And the two sons, if I showed you them side by side, they\u2019re brothers. [laughs] My daughter, I told Margie, \u201cAre you sure you didn\u2019t go to some biker bar drinking one night?\u201d Because I\u2019ve done that several times and maybe that deal just kind of happened.<\/p>\n

BM: What did she do that made such an impact on your kids?<\/p>\n

\"Screen<\/a>TP: She did things kind of like the things my mom did. Positive things. My mom didn\u2019t have an education behind her. Margie did and added to it. I don\u2019t know how to get the point across, other than, well, here\u2019s an example. I was a very small kid. I\u2019ll never forget it, my mom had an ability to take a house that would be condemned and fix it into, like I said, I didn\u2019t know we were poor. She would do stuff on the walls, she would paint, do things and get rid of stuff so that the house would be clean and spotless. And I was a little kid and I got some crayons and I colored on the walls, and she come around the corner after her hard work and looked at me and goes, \u201cTom!\u201d And I just froze. And then she recomposed and said, \u201cOh, honey.\u201d I was trying to figure out what I\u2019d done wrong. And she goes, \u201cYou drew pictures on the wall. So when I wash the wall, I\u2019m afraid that beautiful picture will go away.\u201d And she got me a piece of paper and said, \u201cWill you copy that picture for me so I\u2019ll have it forever?\u201d And my god, I was panicked. I sat there I\u2019m sure with my tongue out, tracing it, trying to make sure it was just like the one on the wall; I knew how important it was to her. And I never colored on the wall after that. Because I knew that mom liked them on paper, so she could keep them. And right now, if you\u2019re dumb enough to be a door-to-door salesman at my mom and dad\u2019s house, you\u2019re gonna get taken in, you\u2019re gonna have to see that painting along with all the Black Belt magazines from 1974, to everything I\u2019ve ever done, all the newspaper articles, the covers I\u2019ve been on. Over time, the door-to-door salesmen have learned to avoid that house. [laughs]<\/p>\n

BM: That story really gets to me. It makes me tear up.<\/p>\n

TP: Yep.<\/p>\n

BM: Do you have anything you\u2019d like to add that I haven\u2019t asked?<\/p>\n

TP: The only thing I would like to add is, God bless you for taking the time to do this, because you\u2019re like starting the virus. And I just hope that it\u2019s really successful, and I hope that it does something where people like me can get the message, and maybe even learn to implement it.<\/p>\n

BM: It\u2019s people like you who put these concepts into everyday language so that everyone can understand the importance of love. I appreciate that gift you have. And I appreciate your time today.<\/p>\n

TP: I appreciate you. Thank you so much.\"Screen<\/a><\/p>\n

BM: I\u2019ll have to come for a visit you and buy you a cold one.<\/p>\n

TP: Yes, yes, and we have to do that down in Venice, because beer is always better where bikini babes are walking by. [laughs]<\/p>\n

BM: [laughs] Can\u2019t argue with that.<\/p>\n

Special thanks to Tom for his time, wisdom, and delightful sense of humor.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

On August 29, 2013, The Only Love Project’s Bill Murphy (BM) spent an enjoyable hour via Skype with Hollywood actor, stunt performer, director, and producer Tom Proctor (TM). What follows is the transcript of our conversation. Enjoy! BM: Briefly tell … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_active":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_note":"","_exactmetrics_sitenote_category":0},"categories":[50,180,55,182,183,179,185,168,215,181,184,178,165],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.theonlyloveproject.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/763"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.theonlyloveproject.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.theonlyloveproject.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.theonlyloveproject.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.theonlyloveproject.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=763"}],"version-history":[{"count":11,"href":"https:\/\/www.theonlyloveproject.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/763\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1617,"href":"https:\/\/www.theonlyloveproject.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/763\/revisions\/1617"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.theonlyloveproject.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=763"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.theonlyloveproject.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=763"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.theonlyloveproject.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=763"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}